Thursday, May 21, 2009

please, body, don't give up on me!

I have been feeling kinda, sorta okay this past week physically. But last night was really tough for me. I had been feeling bloated and my knees and ankles and muscles were hurting more than usual. It progressively got worse as the day went on (and it didn't help that I had been running around all day for work). Well, when I got home and changed into shorts and a t-shirt, I could see my ankles were SO swollen, and so were my legs and knees! WTF??? So, of course, it concerned me because I was swollen and in a lot of pain - but I elevated my legs and stayed the way the whole evening and night.

When I woke up this morning, the swelling and pain had subsided quite a bit. And now it's back to the "regular" level of bloating, water retention, and pain I have everyday. So...to sum up this lovely story, I am just assuming that I was retaining a ton of water in my body for some reason (especially my legs and feet) and thankfully, it didn't last long this time around. It's just frustrating because my body is always giving me so much freaking anxiety! I know I have brought this all upon myself because I haven't treated my body with respect at all for years and years, but I am trying to now, and I just hope and pray that it is not too late for me to repair this broken and fragile body of mine...

4 comments:

  1. So what did you decide about inpatient? I am rootin for ya! :D

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  2. One therapist I saw (before she fired me, but good advice nonetheless) said, "There is never something so unfixable until you die" so keep staying alive miss Jenn, you can doo it!!!

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  3. Re-feeding? I don't know. It sounds pretty annoying!

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  4. Thanks gals. Re-feeding IS annoying and frusterating but I just need to find things to distract myself so I am not focusing on the way my body feels and how freaking UNCOMFORTABLE i always am...easier said than done though, right?

    We are still deciding as a treatment team what to do with me...

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