I am feeling a lot of emotions. Today I filled out application forms for a local college... am I really doing this? Am I really letting go and giving up that dream of finishing up at the Fashion Institute and having a career in fashion? Am I really closing this door?
Can I at least leave the door unlocked or keep it open a crack??
What if I am making the wrong decision? I don't know what to do! Do I follow my heart and do what I love or do I follow the realistic and safe path and try to find something else I love to do as a career?
I know finishing school at SLFI will be a huge trigger to my recovery - especially since I am still struggling as much as I am - but what if I am strong enough? What if??? Or what if I just need to accept that this is not the right environment for me and move on? I am so confused and feeling very sad (to be quite honest). I just don't want to make the wrong decision. I have made too many in the past and I am not getting any younger, I need to move forward with my life... I just don't know which road to take.